20 things I learned from The Bourne Ultimatum
Monday, August 06, 2007
1) When in doubt, tie your shoelaces. 2) It sucks to be a part of the CIA's Information Systems and Tech department. You get zero sleep and you get reprimanded in front of your colleagues.
3) Your ex clearly isn't over his past love if he makes you dye your hair to be the same color as hers.
4) When threatened, why go for a huge flower vase when a book makes a better weapon?
5) Journalists never follow directions.
6) If you need to go through your neighbor's firewall, just roll a pair of boxers around your hand and you will be shard-free.
7) Upon knowing that the enemy is within 1000 yards, it is not wise to leave the building empty and vulnerable.
8) Rappers can afford bullet-proof windows in their cars. NYPD can't.
9) Bourne is a much higher priority than terrorism.
10) Bourne prefers Google. And Motorola RAZR.
11) You don't necessarily get hear loss or any ear injury for that matter when you're situated right next to a motor bomb.
12) Sidewalk-vending cellphones is a very good business especially when you're in assassin infested countries.
13) CIA agents always talk on their phones near a glass window.
14) Why leave bread trails when you can break your cellphone into pieces?
15) Be careful of sliding blinds ad boards. There's bound to be a sniper in position there.
16) Turns out it's easy to get a job in the CIA. Just show up with a sad face, throw in your dogtag, take a dip in the tub with a bag over your head and that's it. You're hired.
17) CIA agents use Norton Anti-virus.
18) When Jason Bourne pays you a visit in your house it only means a family member is dead.
19) If you're a high ranking official in the CIA with a lot of secrets, it is best not to place TOP SECRET in bold red letters on any of your documents. Too obvious, eh?
20) Never f*ck with Jason Bourne.
posted by maudester @ 3:24 PM
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